Wednesday, June 8, 2011

Not One Baby, but Two Babies

Today I'm pleased to bring you a guest blog from my dear friend Darlena. She shares a heartfelt letter of gratitude and hope for her twin daughters. Head over to Tales of an Unlikely Mother to follow along with her adventures in raising her beautiful girls!

Dear Babies,

We’re coming up on your third year, and truth be told, you’re not babies anymore. I have to get with the times. You’re running around, talking fluently, making up your own games and exploring your ever-expanding world. It’s that very same world that scares me, as I’m sure it scares many parents.

There is so much meanness here. So many pitfalls, so much to look out for. There are so many who would hurt you, from government to strangers to family. You are so strong and yet so delicate. I see your happiness, your innocence, and I want you to be able to hold onto that. I know it cannot be. To view the world completely with the eyes of a child as an adult is to welcome all sorts of hardships. To make it here, you must be slowly prepared for the realities I wish were not so.

Soon the days where a chocolate milk and a Band Aid will cure all ailments will end. Then what will I do? You’ll learn that sometimes when people leave, they don’t come back. You’ll learn Santa isn’t real, that Dora isn’t really your friend, and that not everyone has kindness in their hearts. My heart breaks for your upcoming discoveries.

I can only hope that I can keep you as safe as possible, that I can be there for you as your illusions vanish, that you can see the world’s harshness without having to experience it.

I know I give you two a hard time for being two. We often joke around here, “not one baby, but two babies!” But in this way, I’m so glad you do have a twin. Already, you’re so close. If one falls, the other is there with a kiss to help. If one is unhappy, the other searches for a way to change that. You look out for each other. You tell on each other when things get dicey. You help each other learn and grow. When one learns a new trick or idea, you help the other catch up.

I hope as you grow, you never drift apart. I know that as a team, you can do anything. I know that should I fail you, should I cease to exist, should the world pile upon your shoulders, you’ll always have a support system in each other. You are a team.

Yes, right now, you may hate taking turns. You may hate having to wait. You may want to play different games or watch different shows. Your sister may cramp your style sometimes, but for the most part, already, your entire world is tied up in her world. That’s not a bad thing. For as you grow into your own personalities, as you move away and make your own way, you’ll have a protection that many will never know. If you can keep your relationship strong, you’ll never lack for companionship or understanding.

They say twins have a special bond. I hope they’re right. I want many things in my life, but what I want most of all, above all else, is for my babies to be safe and loved. I feel like we’ve all been blessed. You were born with a built-in safety, a built-in loved one.

I truly am the luckiest woman alive, and it’s thanks to you two. “Not one baby, but two babies.”

Thank you.

Darlena Cunha blogs at Tales of an Unlikely Mother. She's a former television news producer turned stay at home mom to her toddler twin girls.

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  1. Great post!

    I worry about these same issues for my oldest boy, who is about to turn 4. It is so hard to find the balance between keeping him innocent and teaching him that not all people are kind or trustworthy.

    I am also the mom of 17 mos old boy/girl twins, and I see the other part of what you are saying in the two of them. They will always have each other. They will always have a built-in support system. And lucky for my two babies, that includes an amazing big brother. :)

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